Posts belonging to Category 'Daily Zings'
March 11, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
Nancy, the two-faced (literally), lying, tax-dollar-funded-booze-drinking, hypocritical, left-wing-extremist, Pelosi is a scum-bag and should be kicked out of the House of Representatives for being out-of-touch, certifiable, and straitjacket-worthy! When Aunt Nance became Speaker of the House she promised she’d “restore accountability and transparency” in government and has continually touted the “idear” (as ‘Sir Genghis Khan Kerry’ would say) that she currently runs one of the “most transparent House of Representatives in history.”
Hmm. . . Is that what you call it, ‘Aunt Wack-Face?’ During a recent conference of legislators, Speaker Pelosi said the following in regards to the health care reform bill: “Congress has to pass the bill so you can find out what’s in it, away from the fog of controversy.” Oh really? Tell you what ‘Aunt Botox,’ if that’s the case, why don’t you also go ahead and buy this car from me for $2.5 trillion samolians? After it’s purchased I’ll let you look inside it, pop up the hood, and take it for a test drive . . . but not before you’ve purchased it!
You can’t fool us, ‘Madam Fake Face!’ When you say “transparent” it actually means it’s about as clear as a dirty ol’ cow-pie! Get a freaking clue! You’re out of your demented dome and your bill smells like a fresh cow-turd! Nance, Do your country the best honor you possibly could and resign today!
Categories: Daily Zings | 
Tags: Government corruption, Health Care Reform lack of transparency, Lack of transparency in politics, Madam Pelosi is a liar, Miss Pelosi and transparency, Nancy Pelosi transparency, Speaker Nancy Pelosi and corruption, Speaker Pelosi is not transparent, White House transparency | 
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March 10, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
You might be a liberal politician if…
Whilst in a public shower you poke other naked people in their chest with your finger and threaten them.
You ignore the majority of the American people who are against universal healthcare and try to shove it down their grubby little faces anyway.
You try to change the constitution to fit your agenda of socialized medicine.
You’re a woman and have a shrill voice. Don’t believe me? Example 1 and 2 (skip to 1:07 and then 1:30)
You pay off other senators to buy their vote for your bill.
You wear tweed or corduroy.
Your ideologies are walking contradictions.
You are for something and then against it and then for it again.
Your political heroes are mass murdering dictators who piss on human rights.
You say things like pah-ki-stahn, koh-puhn-hah-guhn
You’re accused of a sex scandal by your own party coincidently at the same time they are trying to pass a bill that you don’t support and will not vote for.
And lastly…
You might be a liberal politician if… you suck.
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: democrat, eleanor clift, eric massa, Health Care, Hillary Clinton, Liberal, politician, rahm emanuel, socialized, univeral | No Comments »
March 9, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
Democratic Congressman Eric “Creepy” Massa (D) of N.Y. actually e-mailed the TDZ crew and submitted this amazingly zingful story! Mr. Massa really went for it and he didn’t hold back any punches, so Mr. Massa we will run your zing. Due to this zing you created, you may receive a lot more than a dead fish on your door step. Rahmbo might put a stallion’s severed head in your bed! So with no further adieu, Mr. Massa’s zing.
“Let me tell you a story about Rahm Emanuel, I was a congressman in my first eight weeks, and I was in the congressional gym, and I went down and I worked out and I went into the showers…I’m sitting there showering, naked as a jaybird and here comes Rahm Emanuel not even with a towel wrapped around his tush, poking his finger in my chest, yelling at me because I wasn’t going to vote for the president’s budget. Do you know how awkward it is to have a political argument with a naked man? By the way, what the heck is he doing in the Congressional gym, He goes there to intimidate members of Congress…He’s hated me since day one, and now he wins. Rahm Emanuel is son of the devil’s spawn! He is an individual who would sell his mother to get a vote. He would strap his children to the front end of a steam locomotive.” (Rep. Eric Massa D-NY)
Prison showers?
P.S. Democratic Congressman Eric “Creepy” Massa resigned amid ethics violations accusing him of man on man sexual harassment! Massa’s aide claims, and I quote, “Mr. Massa told me, he should be trying to f@#k me. Then Massa tussled my hair.” The TDZ is very confused with the Democrats homoerotic tactics of zinging one another and themselves! But it is very amusing and we really hope they keep it up.
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: Congressman Eric Massa, Massa and Rahm Emanuel in the shower, Massa rant, Massa sexual harassment, political humor, Political Satire, rahm emanuel | No Comments »
March 4, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
What is the deal with N.Y.C. this week? The T.D.Z. on Monday highlighted the many dirty dealings of New York Congressman Charlie Rangel (click here). Now, as if trying to upstage that dishonorable feat, New York Governor David Paterson is dropping scandals like it’s hot! Paterson was brought into fill the very dirty shoes of Eliot “Client #9″ Spitzer… so you would think Paterson would be cautious, but that is not the case. On his first day in office, Paterson revealed he had cheated on his wife, then the next week he admitted to using marijuana and cocaine! Sounds like Paterson not only has the integrity and morals to be a great Governor, but should aspire to become president. Paterson has been laying low for the most part as of late, but all that changed the last couple weeks when allegations came forth that Paterson interfered with a criminal investigation of his personal aid. Paterson’s aid was accused of beating and sexually assaulting a woman. So like any dirty politician with power would do, Paterson has been harassing and even personally calling the victim…asking her to drop the charges. Now, just today, new charges of breaking ethics laws on receiving gifts have come to light. ‘Patty,’ let’s set the record straight, you are a philandering, coke and weed using, victim intimidating, thief! Governor, you have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting!
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: Charlie Rangel tax evasion, Charlie Rangle scandal, Conservative satire, Governor David Paterson ethics violation, Governor David Paterson scandal, New York Governor scandals, political humor | 1 Comment »
March 2, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
You unlock this door with a vote of stupidity. Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of narcissism, a dimension of deceit, a dimension of yuck. You’re moving into a land of both half truths and flat out lies, of bribes and bad ideas; you’ve just crossed over into the “Capitol Hill Zone.”
The actress with the lead role in the ‘Capitol Hill Zone,’ is Nancy Pelosi. Kudos to the hair, make-up and costume guy, I don’t know how he came up with that look but Nancy gives me the creeps every time I see her. A Tony is headed your way, Sir.
In last week’s episode, Nancy said she considers herself a part of the Tea Party movement. Link here. But Nancy, didn’t you say the Tea Party was astroturf, and compare them to Nazis? Now I’m so confused!
My guess is Nancy has finally realized that the Tea Party is not just a group of complaining, hillbilly conservatives, but an actual movement consisting of Republicans, Independents and Democrats and she is now trying to save herself with the old “if you can’t beat them, join them” attitude. Sounds like a great plan Nancy, and it would have worked, but unfortunately, we live in a world with those ‘magic TV machines’ that record everything you say.
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: astroturf, Nancy Pelosi, nazis, share similar ideas, tea party, twilight zone | 1 Comment »
