Hmm. . .  Is that what you call it, ‘Aunt Wack-Face?’ During a recent conference of legislators, Speaker Pelosi said the following in regards to the health care reform bill: “Congress has to pass the bill so you can find out what’s in it, away from the fog of controversy.”  Oh really?  Tell you what ‘Aunt Botox,’ if that’s the case, why don’t you also go ahead and buy this car from me for $2.5 trillion samolians?  After it’s purchased I’ll let you look inside it, pop up the hood, and take it for a test drive . . . but not before you’ve purchased it!

You can’t full us, ‘Madam Fake Face!’   When you say “transparent” it actually means it’s about as clear as a dirty ol’ cow-pie!  Get a freaking clue!  You’re out of your demented dome and your bill smells like a fresh cow-turd!  Nance, Do your country the best honor you possibly could and resign today!

Whilst in a public shower you poke other naked people in their chest with your finger and threaten them.

You ignore the majority of the American people who are against universal healthcare and try to shove it down their grubby little faces anyway.

You try to change the constitution to fit your agenda of socialized medicine.

You’re a woman and have a shrill voice.  Don’t believe me?  Example 1 and 2 (skip to 1:07 and then 1:30)

You pay off other senators to buy their vote for your bill.

You wear tweed or corduroy.

Your ideologies are walking contradictions.

You are for something and then against it and then for it again.

Your political heroes are mass murdering dictators who piss on human rights.

You say things like pah-ki-stahn, koh-puhn-hah-guhn

You’re accused of a sex scandal by your own party coincidently at the same time they are trying to pass a bill that you don’t support and will not vote for.

And lastly…

You might be a liberal politician if… you suck.

“Let me tell you a story about Rahm Emanuel, I was a congressman in my first eight weeks, and I was in the congressional gym, and I went down and I worked out and I went into the showers…I’m sitting there showering, naked as a jaybird and here comes Rahm Emanuel not even with a towel wrapped around his tush, poking his finger in my chest, yelling at me because I wasn’t going to vote for the president’s budget. Do you know how awkward it is to have a political argument with a naked man? By the way, what the heck is he doing in the Congressional gym, He goes there to intimidate members of Congress…He’s hated me since day one, and now he wins. Rahm Emanuel is son of the devil’s spawn! He is an individual who would sell his mother to get a vote. He would strap his children to the front end of a steam locomotive.” (Rep. Eric Massa D-NY)

Prison showers?

P.S. Democratic Congressman Eric “Creepy” Massa resigned amid ethics violations accusing him of man on man sexual harassment! Massa’s aide claims, and I quote, “Mr. Massa told me, he should be trying to f@#k me. Then Massa tussled my hair.” The TDZ is very confused with the Democrats homoerotic tactics of zinging one another and themselves! But it is very amusing and we really hope they keep it up.

My favorite part of Dylan’s rant was this:  “You’re wasting valuable oxygen. Can we please cut off this man’s microphone? He has no interest in answering any of my questions. Mark, a pleasure – actually not really a pleasure. It was offensive. You’re offensive. Your treatment of my show as a vehicle to spread your propaganda, ignore my questions, offensive. And an indication of what is wrong with the dialogue in this country, period. ..”

Haha!  Dylan, you sounded like a spoiled little school-boy brat crying about whom gets first player on Mario Kart. . . Dylan, the only indication we got from this is that your opinion of “dialogue in this country” is hypocritical and wack, and that you’re just a little huffy-puffy, school-boy, roid-ragin,’ freak!  Easy on the ‘needle therapy,’ bud!!

It is painful to peer upon Rangel.

Even shameful to gaze upon his hair dangle.

The famous politician side part is not newfangled,

but since its birth, quite disdainful .

From this side view it curls towards the sky angle.

Please don’t touch, and be careful not to mangle,

for it is a nightmare to comb and untangle.

Do not mock or he will pounce upon thee like a big tiger bangle.

Dare not to accuse him of tax evasion, or he shall find thee and strangle.

The poem is over for I can’t find more words to rope nor to wrangle.

The ironic thing is that recently, the supposedly “fiscal disciplined” Lib’s agreed to a “Pay-as-you-go” (PAYGO) budgeting manuever in order to pass a bill that permitted the federal deficit to increase by another $1.7 trillion dollars.  The PAYGO budgeting states that in order for the federal government to pass a bill, they have to determine at that time how they’re going to pay for it… you know, like if you wanted to go by a new car you would actually have to think about how you’re going to pay for it instead of just throwing it on your credit card and forgetting about it.  What!?!?  Think about how to pay for something?  That’s a completely weird idea!!  I prefer my Obama-card instead!  I like free money!

When the Lib’s brought this $15 billion dollar bill to the senate floor to be voted on, Senator Jim Bunning said- “I object.” Why?  Because Jim had the nards to serve up a platter of Facial to the lip-service Lib’s who always claim one thing and do the opposite.  You see, he objected because in the proposed $15 billion dollar bill the Lib’s wanted him to support, the senate had only determined how to pay for $5 billion of that bill.  So, that little PAYGO requirement that the Lib’s agreed to do didn’t seem to mean anything and Jim wanted to put the Lib’s on blast for it!  Of course the “drive-by media” goons spun it to make Senator Bunning look like a hatemonger. Go figure!

Looks like the only “pay-as-you-go” that’s going on right now seems to be the ”Cornhusker Kickback,” “Louisiana Purchase,” and “Gator-aide!” Senator Bunning, thanks for walking the walk.  If only the rest of our elected officials had the backbone you have.  As a result of your efforts, the TDZ awards you with the highly desired Bad Ace of the Week Award!  Click here for the full story & video: http://blog.heritage.org/2010/03/02/senator-jim-bunning-%E2%80%93-%E2%80%9Ci-object%E2%80%9D/

You unlock this door with a vote of stupidity.  Beyond it is another dimension: a dimension of narcissism, a dimension of deceit, a dimension of yuck.  You’re moving into a land of both half truths and flat out lies, of bribes and bad ideas; you’ve just crossed over into the “Capitol Hill Zone.”

The actress with the lead role in the ‘Capitol Hill Zone,’ is Nancy Pelosi.  Kudos to the hair, make-up and costume guy, I don’t know how he came up with that look but Nancy gives me the creeps every time I see her.  A Tony is headed your way, Sir.

In last week’s episode, Nancy said she considers herself a part of the Tea Party movement.  Link here.  But Nancy, didn’t you say the Tea Party was astroturf, and compare them to Nazis?  Now I’m so confused!

My guess is Nancy has finally realized that the Tea Party is not just a group of complaining, hillbilly conservatives, but an actual movement consisting of Republicans, Independents and Democrats and she is now trying to save herself with the old “if you can’t beat them, join them” attitude.  Sounds like a great plan Nancy, and it would have worked, but unfortunately, we live in a world with those ‘magic TV machines’ that record everything you say.

How crooked is Chucky Rangel?  Let thee count the ways!

1. Chucky rented four, rent-stabilized apartments in a Harlem luxury building and used one of them as his campaign office.  This arrangement violates New York State and city laws that require a rent-stabilized apartment to be used as one’s primary residence.  After the story broke, Rangel promptly moved the office from his apartment and filed an ethics complaint against himself.

2. Chucky used congressional stationery to solicit funds for his personal foundation from companies with business before his committee.  In response, Rangel filed another ethics complaint against himself. P.S. Rangel also secured a $1.9 million earmark for his foundation, the Charles B. Rangel Center for Public Service AKA “The Monument to Rangel.”  Reminds me of the Derek Zoolander Center For Children Who Can’t Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.

3. Chucky failed to disclose income earned renting out his Caribbean villa. Rangel failed to report the $75,000 in income not only on his congressional disclosure forms, but also on his state and federal income tax filings.  Also, Rangel hadn’t paid interest on the villa’s mortgage for 10 years.  Due to his sweetheart loan he received from Theodore Kheel, a prominent New York slime ball labor lawyer.  Mr. Kheel, has given tens of thousands of dollars to Mr. Rangel’s campaigns over the past decade.  Rangel once again, called for an ethics investigation against himself.

4. Chucky violated Congressional gift rules by accepting corporate-sponsored trips to the Caribbean in 2007 and 2008. The House Ethics Committee stated that it had admonished Representative Charles B. Rangel for gift rules violations.

Folks I could go on all day airing out Chucky Rangel’s dirty laundry and pulling skeletons out of his multiple closets in D.C., Harlem, and Dominican villas!  When I googled “Charlie Rangel scandals” my computer almost crashed for crying out loud.  Bottom line is that Rangel is on his tenth strike!  Will Pelosi and the Dems ever take some responsibility and fire this crooked loser?  We’d like to file an ethics complaint against Charlie Rangel’s bunt (butt in front), seen here.