Did I Eat a Hot Pocket for Breakfast

February 8, 2010 | Posted by TDZ

It’s Monday morning, you’re tired, the heart burn is raging from the “all you can eat wing fest,” you lost a $100 bucks on the Colts because Manning was a “sure thing,” and you forgot all about the cost to benefit analysis report you were supposed to have on your boss’s desk this morning. But hey, at least you’re not one of these guys. And if you just so happen to be one of these guys… at least you’re not this guy.

Obama the magnificent, the genius, Mr. Harvard himself ran into a little prompter problem. I guess he temporarily forgot how to read when he started mispronouncing “corpsman” as “corpse-man.” You just got ‘prompter punked.’

Akio Toyoda, President of Toyota, recently announced a 2.2 billion dollar recall of some cars and trucks due to gas and brake problems. Awkward! That’s going to be a fun meeting with the board and investors. Not to mention the apology to America.

Scott Lee Cohen, Democrat nominee for lieutenant governor of Illinois, recently dropped out of the race just a week after he earned the nomination from his party. “But why?” you ask. Well only because he was accused of beating his spouse and later holding a knife to the throat of his prostitute girlfriend. Uhh… Is this the best the Democratic party could come up with for a candidate? Sounds about right!

I don’t know where, but somewhere in America some poor sap invested $10 grand in these sure to be money makers.

Happy Monday, time to call in sick.