March 8, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
Did you all know that Mark McGwire had a brother in the cable news business? Click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nObPplOGUdI Wow! Apparently, Mark and Dylan have the same “Nutritionist” too. . . The only difference is Mark used the needle-in-the-butt nutrition to go yard on the ball field, while his brother, Dylan ‘Roid-Rage’ Ratigan, uses it to go berserk in the news room. Hey Dylan, ease up on the “needle therapy,” you roid-monkey!!
My favorite part of Dylan’s rant was this: “You’re wasting valuable oxygen. Can we please cut off this man’s microphone? He has no interest in answering any of my questions. Mark, a pleasure – actually not really a pleasure. It was offensive. You’re offensive. Your treatment of my show as a vehicle to spread your propaganda, ignore my questions, offensive. And an indication of what is wrong with the dialogue in this country, period. ..”
Haha! Dylan, you sounded like a spoiled little school-boy brat crying about whom gets first player on Mario Kart. . . Dylan, the only indication we got from this is that your opinion of “dialogue in this country” is hypocritical and wack, and that you’re just a little huffy-puffy, school-boy, roid-ragin,’ freak! Easy on the ‘needle therapy,’ bud!!
Categories: Uncategorized | 
Tags: conservatives, Dylan Ratigan, Humor, liberals, political humor, Politics, republicans, steroids, tea party, Tea Party Express, white house, Wing nuts | 
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March 3, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
Once again, the ever so cunning, promise one thing and do completely the opposite, silly little creatures, known as Lib’s, are being butt-nuggets! This time the greasy little Lib’s are all butt-hurt with Kentucky Senator, Jim Bunning, because he’s blocking a $15 billion bill full of a bunch of big government, socialist, b.s., that we simply can’t afford!
The ironic thing is that recently, the supposedly “fiscal disciplined” Lib’s agreed to a “Pay-as-you-go” (PAYGO) budgeting manuever in order to pass a bill that permitted the federal deficit to increase by another $1.7 trillion dollars. The PAYGO budgeting states that in order for the federal government to pass a bill, they have to determine at that time how they’re going to pay for it… you know, like if you wanted to go by a new car you would actually have to think about how you’re going to pay for it instead of just throwing it on your credit card and forgetting about it. What!?!? Think about how to pay for something? That’s a completely weird idea!! I prefer my Obama-card instead! I like free money!
When the Lib’s brought this $15 billion dollar bill to the senate floor to be voted on, Senator Jim Bunning said- “I object.” Why? Because Jim had the nards to serve up a platter of Facial to the lip-service Lib’s who always claim one thing and do the opposite. You see, he objected because in the proposed $15 billion dollar bill the Lib’s wanted him to support, the senate had only determined how to pay for $5 billion of that bill. So, that little PAYGO requirement that the Lib’s agreed to do didn’t seem to mean anything and Jim wanted to put the Lib’s on blast for it! Of course the “drive-by media” goons spun it to make Senator Bunning look like a hatemonger. Go figure!
Looks like the only “pay-as-you-go” that’s going on right now seems to be the ”Cornhusker Kickback,” “Louisiana Purchase,” and “Gator-aide!” Senator Bunning, thanks for walking the walk. If only the rest of our elected officials had the backbone you have. As a result of your efforts, the TDZ awards you with the highly desired Bad Ace of the Week Award! Click here for the full story & video: http://blog.heritage.org/2010/03/02/senator-jim-bunning-%E2%80%93-%E2%80%9Ci-object%E2%80%9D/
Categories: American B.A. | Tags: cornhusker kickback, Jim Bunning, Kentucky Senator, liberals, Louisiana Purchase, Pay-as-you-go, PAYGO, political humor, Politics, white house | No Comments »
February 23, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
Harry, the creepy, soft-talking, grease-ball is at it again! This time he made a threat to his fellow Nevadans. How did he threaten them? Well, ‘Scary Harry,’ while talking about the highly saturated domestic crisis shelters in his home state, said – “Men, when they’re out of work, tend to become abusive. . .” So let me get this right Harry, you creepy goon…what you’re saying is that next November if you’re not reelected you’re going to become abusive? Because you’re surely going to be out of a job for none other than being abusive, not to your wife though, rather to your fellow republican senators, the American people, and your constituents! You better get a good marriage therapist now, you’re going to need one next November, butt-face-Reid!!
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: domestic abuse, Funny, Harry Reid, Liberal, Nevada shelter, obama, Politics, republican, Senate, The Daily Zing, Voters, white house | 1 Comment »
February 18, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
In the land of ‘Obama-topia,’ this year’s stimulus season was a rough one for all those rookies in the White House. On this first annual celebration of the passing of that dandy $787 billion (which is now estimated to cost us $75 billion more than projected) dollar economy saving, job creating, masterpiece, we only saw it fit to join CNN and throw a party (yes, CNN really did have a birthday cake to mark the one year anniversary of the stimulus bill…just curious, I wonder if that was the same day they had their lowest ratings in over 4 years…). But our party is more of a ‘facial-fact-fest,’ if you will… The problem is that the facials were delivered directly to the nose of the American people like a high & inside wild fast ball thrown by a rookie. Those rookie goons in the White House promised before the stimulus was passed that unemployment would not exceed 8% if the bill was passed… well, that didn’t take long to prove that one wrong! Unemployment is now at 9.7%. In our face! Thank you hope and change! Those rookie morons also promised that their stimulus would create 3.5 million jobs… There are actually 2.8 million less jobs now than when the stimulus bill was passed…in our face part deux! Wait, you thought the White House said they “created or saved” 2 million jobs from the stimulus bill, right? Well, apparently, these rookie goons, with their Ivy League degrees, are so smart they’re stupid!!! When you claim to have created 2 million jobs, yet there are actually 2.8 million less jobs…that’s called ‘lack of addition skills dot idiot dot gov dot White House!’ Furthermore, those jobs were promised to be “shovel ready jobs” too. Weird how that works, out of the $862 billion dollar bill, only 5% is designated for “shovel ready jobs.” Hmmm…. How does that work again? Well, if a lot of “shovel ready jobs” are created from quick spending, it will save the economy…right Mr. President? Wrong! You see, the stimulus bill was actually set up in a way where more money will be spent between the years 2011 and 2019 than in 2009…In our face part ‘tres!’ And if these facts aren’t enough to convince you our President and his Administration are wack and in over their heads, the recent Gallup poll will help you come to your senses…despite what diarrhea mouth Olbermann & company will tell you! The poll states that only 6% of Americans believe the stimulus bill worked…. Can you say “in our face part four!?” The numbers never lie! Unless the numbers are coming from a greasy politician! So, as for the “Rookie of the Year” in the land of ‘Obama-topia,’ as much as Creepy Chrissy Mathews would like us to award it to “O,” the yearly stats show that Unemployment unanimously deserves the award! Coming in at nearly 10% and closer to 17% if you count the people no longer looking for jobs. Don’t you just love those liberal policies full of all that “hope” and “change?” Barf!!!!!!!!
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: billions, obama, Politics, rookie of the year, Stimulus, white house | No Comments »
February 15, 2010 | Posted by TDZ
Uhhh… you say what now? That poll said what? Wait a second, what’s the numbers again? Can we throw in some more words like “hope” and “change” and possibly get those poll numbers back in our favor? Hey Rham, has Uncle Joe (Biden) been appearing on a lot of networks lately…I mean golly, what’s the deal with the American people!? TDZ sources tell us that these have been the words repeatedly uttered out of President Obama’s mouth lately…well, so maybe that’s not completely true, but if Uncle Joe can start claiming credit for all the success that’s occurring in Iraq, the TDZ can predict the words being spoken by “O”!
Poll update alert:
According to recent Rasmussen poll, just 28% of Americans think our representatives in the House and Senate should continue building on the current health care bills in the House & Senate. 61% think they should completely scrap them and start over. http://www.cnsnews.com/news/article/61262
According to a recent Quinnipiac poll, only 25% of Americans think terror suspects should be tried with the same constitutional rights as U.S. civilians. http://www.cnsnews.com/news/article/61201
According to a recent Gallup poll, just 36% of Americans approve of President Obama’s handling of the economy. http://www.politico.com/blogs/laurarozen/0210/Job_approval.html
According to a recent Pew poll, just 28% of Americans think Global Warming should be within the top 20 priorities of the current administration. http://people-press.org/report/584/policy-priorities-2010
According to a recent Rasmussen poll, 63% of Americans believe it would be better for the country if the current incumbents in congress were not reelected this November. (Rasmussen poll here)_
According to a recent TDZ poll, 100% of Americans think the “Inglourious Basterds” should be flown into Iran to take care of Ah-ma-GOON-a-job! http://www.flickr.com/photos/thedailyzing/4343175932/
All the TDZ can say is, “poll over” Obama Administration…you’re going way too fast and reckless with all your wack and irresponsible policies!! And as for the accident prone Uncle Biden, please take our words of advice literally!
Categories: Daily Zings | Tags: democrats, Funny, global warming, job approval, Joe Biden, Obama rating, Political Satire, Politics, polls, President of U.S.A., republicans, The Daily Zing, White Houes | No Comments »
Did you all know that Mark McGwire had a brother in the cable news business? Click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nObPplOGUdI Wow! Apparently, Mark and Dylan have the same “Nutritionist” too. . . The only difference is Mark used the needle-in-the-butt nutrition to go yard on the ball field, while his brother, Dylan ‘Roid-Rage’ Ratigan, uses it to go berserk in the news room. Hey Dylan, ease up on the “needle therapy,” you roid-monkey!!
