Cass’s Fibery Flow
March 19, 2010 | Posted by TDZ 
“Let if flow, Let yourself go, Slow and low, That is the tempo.” I’ll bet you never knew the Beastie Boys wrote those lyrics to describe Cass Sunstein’s hair-follicle-flow? Cass, of course, is the Head of the White House Office of Information and Regulatory Affairs (O.I.R.A.). His ‘Cass-flow-comb-over’ was convincing enough to win over his fellow hair follicle magicians on the Left to nominate him as the head of O.I.R.A.
More importantly though, Sir ‘Cass-flow-comb-over’s’ hair is symbolic of his brains. . .In that he only has half of one. But you wouldn’t think that in talking to his left-wing supporters, they say he’s “extremely intellectual,” “he’s a constitutional genius,” “he’s so smart that he’s dumb!” OK, we said the last one, but you get the point!
This guy’s another one of those butt-hurt, butt-nuggets that thinks he’s so “gifted” and “intelligent” that he’s “wiser” than our founding fathers. . .Cass seems to think our first amendment right of freedom of speech needs to be changed because- “like-minded people speak or listen mostly to one another.” No shiz, Sherlock! Why in tar-nation would we want to listen, take advice or trust a dude with the level of ‘hair-follicle-funktitude’ that you have!? Seriously, when was the last time you looked in the mirror? The real reason he hates freedom of speech is because he, and the rest of the loony Lib’s, despise the success of conservative talk radio, conservative cable news, and conservative websites. You can’t fool us, “Sir Ivy League!”
And if you’re still not convinced that this guy’s a goon, well, this will change your mind. ‘Cass-stain’ believes “we should celebrate tax day.” Tell you what Cass, you should celebrate a ’stop-forcing-my-hair-follicle day’ and get that wack, fibery-flow buzzed off your dome!! You look like a goon, you act like a goon, you are a philosophical goon, and you are just plain and simply a- skinny, little, creepy, comb-over enhanced, liberal, G to the O-squared, N!!!!!!!!!!!
Categories: Creations and Comb-Overs | 
Tags: Cass Sunstein, liberal politicians, Office of Information and Regulatory Affairs, OIRA, political humor, The Daily Zing, white house | 
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Harry, the creepy, soft-talking, grease-ball is at it again! This time he made a threat to his fellow Nevadans. How did he threaten them? Well, ‘Scary Harry,’ while talking about the highly saturated domestic crisis shelters in his home state, said – “Men, when they’re out of work, tend to become abusive. . .” So let me get this right Harry, you creepy goon…what you’re saying is that next November if you’re not reelected you’re going to become abusive? Because you’re surely going to be out of a job for none other than being abusive, not to your wife though, rather to your fellow republican senators, the American people, and your constituents! You better get a good marriage therapist now, you’re going to need one next November, butt-face-Reid!!
Uhhh… you say what now? That poll said what? Wait a second, what’s the numbers again? Can we throw in some more words like “hope” and “change” and possibly get those poll numbers back in our favor? Hey Rham, has Uncle Joe (Biden) been appearing on a lot of networks lately…I mean golly, what’s the deal with the American people!? TDZ sources tell us that these have been the words repeatedly uttered out of President Obama’s mouth lately…well, so maybe that’s not completely true, but if Uncle Joe can start claiming credit for all the success that’s occurring in Iraq, the TDZ can predict the words being spoken by “O”!
When political life is tough and you can’t seem to convince your constituents to vote for you, why not just buy their vote? That’s what the Lib’s have up their sleeves! The Mercatus Center at George Mason University has recently revealed where your $787 billion “stimulus” tax-dollars have been aimed, and based upon their results, they may as well have been aimed for the toilet! The Obama Administration’s whole promise that unemployment would not exceed 8% if the stimulus bill was passed didn’t seem to work out too well. Of the $787 billion, thus far just over $157 billion has been awarded. And guess which political districts got most of that ‘cash-money?’ How’d you know? The Democrats! The Mercatus Center reports that of the $157 billion that’s been awarded, 73% of that money has been funneled into Democratic districts…and only 27% into Republican districts. The average dollar amount awarded per Democratic district is almost double that of the amount awarded per Republican district. The average Democratic district has received $439,200,100…while the average Republican district only received $232,047,857. Imagine that! Look out GOP, the Lib’s have hoarded over half a trillion dollars of that so-called “stimulus money,” and they intend to spit that out this election year on their constituents as fast and uncontrollably as Rham Emanuel spits out expletives! So next time you’re in a pickle and can’t seem to win-over your critics’ support…forget about it! Do it the ‘Obama-Rham-Chi-town way,’ and just buy their support!! 
